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Anthony was not gorgeous or even striking, but he was intelligent with a capital I. And so reserved. Deep inside, I knew I was deliberately trying to act helpless and confused around him to get his attention. That usually helps. If you play strong and throw your weight around these kinds of people, they will clam up before you say shoot. Be a nervous, unsure loser in front of them, and they will finally come to the conclusion that you need their help and open the lock in their mouth. Quiet and brainy guys attract me so much, I used to wonder whether I have a kink out of teasing them out of their inhibition. Maybe it gave me a sense of power to change a man’s natural character all by myself. I dislike tall men because they, at least in my part of the world, generally are cocky and arrogant, with no respect for those who are shorter than them. Though I was taller than the average Indian woman, about 5’6′, I felt shaky every time Anthony stood next to me. He was around 6’4′ and built. I still wasn’t better, but I attempted, bravely to go to school. But that wasn’t my first mistake. Oh no. The year before I had met a guy.. Jewish, into computers, cute, and he seemed nice. I suppose he was interested in me, as well as I was interested in him. We would talk online often, about html, java, school, and just life in general. I had told him my problems, so he knew I had been sick. He knew what depression and anxiety were. Obviously, since I had been out of school so much, I needed to make up a lot of work, and I was staying after school nearly every day. Too bad my teacher decided to meet with me during lunch that day, and I decided not to call my mom, but just to read in the library. That was mistake number three. He came into the library and sat down next to me, and began to work on the computer. I would occassionlly watch him, but he would close any files when I looked. He then left the building for two minutes. I quietly read, minding my own business. He came back.
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